Pottsville Invasion of the Body Snatchers (2008)

It's Halloween. Time for a scary story.... When those canisters started appearing in front of Pottsville's buildings after the massive rainwater collection project was completed in 2006, I had a dream that they were part of an alien invasion. Maybe watching "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" 1,ooo times may have had something to do with it. In my dream I was asked to write a review of a movie. My dream came with one intermission for popcorn at 3 A.M.
On the top is a photo of what I am talking about. You see them along Mahantongo St. and the west side.



Look! You fools! You’re in danger! Can’t you see? They’re after you! They’re after all of us! Our wives…our children…they’re here already! You’re next! — Miles Bennett, downtown Pottsville merchant


POTTSVILLE INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS (2008)

On the heels of already three remakes of the original 1956 Invasion of the Body Snatchers, a fourth sequel will be released on January 1st, premiering at the Sovereign Majestic Theatre. I was given a sneak preview and asked to write a review. I promised to release my review a few days prior to the release but little did the producer know that I don’t keep promises. Never have and never will. So here it goes….

I hope you are in the mood for one of the best in science fiction as this is it. The plot follows the original, but with twists. In this version, a local pawn shop owner begins to notice that the local Pottsville citizenry “don’t seem to be themselves lately.” The may look the same, but they are cold and indifferent.

“I'd hate to wake up some morning and find out that you weren't you”

The owner decides to check things out for himself. He walks to the corner of Centre and Mahantongo Streets and patiently waits for the "Walk" signal, while waiting he stares at the fountain next to Dr. Akbar's office wondering if it is really a fountain or just a leaky wall. Five minutes later he runs up Mahantongo Street, discovering that aliens from another world are indeed taking over the city. Emissaries from a distant planet have sent small green and white canisters to be planted in front of buildings and houses. These canisters emit some alien spores that eventually become larger pods that take over the physical likeness of each and every household member. Yes, from these canisters the townspeople are being replaced, one by one - perfect physical duplicates that dispose of their human victims, presumably by placing them out on the sidewalk on the correct garbage pickup day (careful not to violate the five bag limit).

Yes, the space aliens may look just like Pottsvillians but they possess no human emotions. No love, no hate. Why, they are even indifferent to whether or not the Maroons get the 1925 football title back or whether or not the city enforces the building code ordinances They are concerned with only taking over the planet. What better place do it than in Pottsville, the confirmed center of the universe as determined by the curator at the local planetarium.

“At first glance, everything looked the same. It wasn't.... Something evil had taken possession of the town.”

Needless to say, it’s always been hard to tell who is a Pottsvillian and who is a space alien, but in this film the alien population grows so rapidly. Their presence is quite noticeable; the sinister canisters are quite visible to the observant such as me. But most citizens are too busy simultaneously driving and texting sub and pizza orders to Charlie's on their cell phones, unaware of the ever-growing menace. Their craving for fastfood make it so much easier for the aliens.

“ I'm telling you something is going on here.”

The theme of this brilliant, terrifying motion picture is open to various interpretations, including the paranoia surrounding frightening ideologies such as Charlie McCarthyism, or Groucho Marxism. However, someone at the Eagles Bar told me that the canisters have something to do with the massive city sewer project, and that there is absolutely no symbolism in the film. While I say "Hogwash" to any connection with the sewer project I do agree with the barfly that the film is not symbolic. To me the film is a true documentary of the heroic struggle to combat this deadly threat of space invasion, a space invasion that City Hall, the Pottsville High School Planetarium and the Sewer Authority have ignored ever since the Rosewell cover-up.

Finally, I promised the producer not to tell how the movie ends, so here it goes:
The movie ends with climatic shots of the pawn shop owner running down Centre Street futilely trying to warn motorists that “They are here already! Look at the canisters placed in front of the houses and buildings! You’re next!” But the Jeeps and SUVs travel by on their way to Wing Night at the Stadium Bar, with every driver and passenger ignoring him as if he was nothing but another befuddled downtown street person waiting for the Walk sign.

“ Operator, Get me Chief Murton! Sound an all points alarm. Block all highways, stop all traffic, and call every law enforcement agency in the county. Yes, call the bouncers at the Tap! Call the Pinkerton Agents! Call the ruler-toting nuns from atop the Hill! It's an emergency! Those canisters are from outer space! Take a look in front of your own house right now! ...You' re next!!!”

Two thumbs WAY up!