Conundrum

"Conundrum"
That is a fancy word for puzzle or mystery. The conundrum I am facing was created by two opposing recent realities:
1. Mammy got a letter from the Social Security Administration which told her that her benefits are protected against inflation. By law they increase when there is a rise in the cost of living. The government measures changes in the cost of living through the Department of Labor’s Consumer Price Index (CPI). The CPI has not risen since the last cost-of-living adjustment was determined in 2008. As a result her benefits will not increase in 2011 (yes, Mammy is older than me, she is what is referred to as a cougar).
2. Pennsylvania lawmakers and judges are entitled to a cost of living pay increase due to inflation. Yes, I understand that there are different statistical data used for government officials than those used for the regular folks, but it is difficult to explain to others. Starting this month, the 1.6709 percent cost-of-living increase will boost a legislator’s salary to $79,623.23. I tried to remember what some of the fringe benefits included and found an old 2006 list, which included health care insurance, long term nursing home insurance, disability, dental, vision, and prescription insurance, $39,800 per year for expenses; $4,000 for postage, $141 a day stipend on legislative business; $7,800 for auto leasing, and some others including the golden cow – a defined benefit pension. These have all gone up since then I assume.

This puzzle can be referred to as a koan or paradox. But I told Mammy the solution to the koan is obvious, government officials have higher bills to pay than the rest of us. I told her to quit complaining and cut back on her Metamucil intake, try diluting it with more water or eat more dandelions. She can quite the Matlock fan club and save a few bucks on the dues. She can cut back on bleenies and order only five instead of six. We should be blessed that Schuylkill County has three representatives working for us in Harrisburg and they deserve every penny earned as well as those perks.

As for the appellate judges, Cadillacs, Lexuses, Mercedes Benz, and high end SUVs (including one leased by one Supreme Court Justice from his own brother) are expensive to maintain, even if the state pays for their monthly lease payments and reimburses them for mileage. Pennsylvania’s top judges are among the highest paid in the nation and I told Mammy that she should get down on her knees and thank the Lord above that this is so, and hopefully no other state will ever surpass us. I told her that she should check the price of Turtle Wax. It is through the roof.