County Scandal, part I

It was one of those mornings in Schuylkill County when the sky was blue - a teaser before the clouds rolled in for the rest of the day. I was going into the Court House, on my way in to the Treasurer Office, to get my dog tag.  Actually not my dog tag in the possessive sense of that term, but my dog’s tag.  I certainly didn’t need a tag for myself.  I already had one. It is good until I expire.

 I was unable to get down the corridor, blocked by FBI agents carrying boxes out of the Clerk of Court Office to a large, white truck parked in the lot. You probably read about it in the newspaper or saw it on television. Things were moving faster out of the courthouse than bananas sold at Bill’s Produce on Senior Citizen Day or X-Boxes at Wall-Mart the night before Christmas. The Court House is normally quiet unless it is Taco Salad Day at the Canteen Restaurant, when the Mariachi Bands serenade the county employees during lunch hour. This day was no Taco Salad Day, but it was busier than ever.

  I made a bee-line out of that hall of justice as fast as I could, which is not very fast at all.  The dog tag could wait until next year. I already had a large FBI file (as well as my own dog tag and thank God I hadn't yet expired). I didn’t want garner any more attention.  According to Edward Snowden, everyone that has every clicked onto the Beansoup for the Soul Website is listed in the giant Government Surveillance Book. As webmaster I am certainly in it. Besides, many years ago I ripped off tags from mattresses at the Dusselfink Motel which I wanted as souvenirs to remember those nights that I got lucky.  I knew it was against the law, but I ripped off every  tag off that I could.  I courted danger in those days.  I also falsely impersonated a Vulcan once during the Winter Carnival. Now, I had to duck for cover.

 I headed down Second Street and stopped in front of the Eagles Bar, across from the world renowned Lipkin Incubator Building. Unbeknownst to most people, the Incubator is where city chicken was discovered by Mr.Lipkin many years ago.  I looked up at the jutting broken plastic sign, swaying in the breeze, which once proudly stated “Eagles Club” but now had the blank look which characterizes the expression on the faces of people that I passed along the way.  I headed inside. I wanted a drink today and not city chicken.

                                   City chicken could wait! 

 

 I took off my brown fedora, placed it on the bar and grabbed a stool. Before long I noticed I wasn’t alone. I let go of the stool and looked over my shoulder.  There at a table was a man, sitting by himself, smoking a cigarette and looking at daily lottery tickets. He smoked as if he was sending smoke signals to a distant planet. 

I was puzzled. “What planet?..... Pluto? Couldn’t be..... It’s no longer a planet.” My brain started to work over-time.

How much is that worth? I had no answer.

 He was a portly, thick-necked gentleman with greasy, disheveled hair; black with some grey showing at the roots that protruded from his vast scalp .  He apparently used more dye in his hair than all the dye used at the recent St. Clair Fish and Game Easter Egg Hunt.   

He was dressed rather conservatively for Pottsville. That is, he was wearing a clean long- sleeved white shirt and did not have a baseball cap on his head.   In downtown Pottsville, a man wearing anything other than a T shirt and a baseball cap on is about as inconspicuous as a nudist in the Winter Carnival Parade.

 

He signaled me over to his table. It was then I realized I was in a room with the famed City of Pottsville’s Surgeon General. I was asked to join him for a mid-afternoon drink, a pickled egg and several slices of beer bologna, that were lined up in a row on a small white dish. I quickly acquiesced and sat down at his table. It was then I remembered the planet I was trying to think of earlier.

Uranus!

He leaned over and asked me what I had thought of the Lager Jogger 5k Run that had recently been held in the city. I told him that I enjoyed it. He looked at me with sharp distain; staring with his eyes that reminded me of the eyes of the wooden horse that once looked out the window of Knapp’s Leather Good Store on South Centre Street. He raised his left arm and pointed at me as his voice went up two octaves:

“Those foolish people don’t realize that running will cause them shin splints, bunions and falling arches in years to come and not necessarily in that order.  The proper way to any finish line is to shuffle or cake-walk along, or better yet… get a ride. Haven’t these people ever heard of the STS bus system?”

I could see that he was getting upset and I quickly changed the subject. I asked him about an inquiry I had received several days ago.  It concerned the so-called Rest Haven Scandal of the early 1970s.

I was unaware of the details. I wasn’t sure if such a scandal ever occurred and if it did occur, was it sexual in nature. I had thought it may have involved hanky-panky between aged residents. You know, perhaps clandestine illicit relations on a Craftmatic adjustable bed after the lights were out.

The Surgeon-General, puffing on his cigarette, responded curtly, “No, it was not like that at all. Clandestine illicit relations occurred elsewhere in the 1970s causing scandals, not in Rest Haven. You are thinking about Martha's Vineyard or Washington DC.”

 Cigarette smoke then trailed upwards forming a cloud above his large bulbous head. What type of cloud? I quickly remembered. Thank God my brain was still working overtime.

                                     It was a cirrus cloud!

I continued my rapid-fire questioning. “Did the Rest Haven Scandal involve illegal break-ins by so-called plumbers or electricians attempting to fix the Rest Haven Bingo games?  Who would order such a break-in? Would the bingo prizes be that important?”  I remembered that the District Attorney in the 1970s organized bingo raids quite frequently, attempting to eradicate the scourge of bingo once and for all.  Maybe Rest Haven was the crown jewel of that crack-down.

  Again the answer was in the negative.

“What the hell was the Rest Haven Scandal then?”

“Sit back, boy and I will tell you a story that will knock your compression socks off. But first, pass me the salt and help yourself to a pickled egg and  some beer bologna.....  I like horse radish on my hard-boiled egg. How about you?”

                              

                                       TO BE CONTINUED

 

 

 

 

Courthouse Christmas Tree

The Court House Christmas Tree this year is a celebration of the county’s bicentennial as well as a loving salute to our vast number of municipal governments.

The Court House Christmas Tree Committee (CHCTC) has been scrutinizing the submission of ornaments from the various municipalities to be inducted onto a branch on this year’s tree. With so many local governments there is a concern that the tree would be incapable of holding the weight. At last count there were between 67 -253 officially sanctioned municipalities and governmental entities.
Sadly, Yorkville was not allowed to participate in the tree celebration. Yorkville’s controversial hand-painted ceramic Christmas ball featuring the likeness of the Burger King Restaurant was removed by deputy sheriffs after a protest was lodged by the City of Pottsville. It was wrestled to the ground and thrown in the Courthouse Dumpster. As you know, the City claims control of this contested territory as a result of a controversial election about one hundred years ago. If the Yorkville ornament remained on the tree, then Pottsville threatened to remove its numerous ornaments. The Pottsville ornaments are quite spectacular and include a replica of a purse once carried by Crazy Sarah and a string of popcorn. Not just any popcorn, but buttered popcorn that was found beneath the ruins of the Capitol Theatre.

Pottsville insists that Yorkville is an inalienable part of Pottsville and Pottville’s City Hall is the sole legal authority over the disputed territory. This authoritarian policy had created tension and saber-rattling in the neighboring municipalities of Mount Carbon, Palo Alto, Mechanicsville, Port Carbon and Shoentown; all of which still refuse to recognize the absorption of Yorkville into Greater Pottsville. These neighboring municipalities still recognize a free and independent Yorkville with its capital building at Lotz’s Café on West Market Street.

Incidentally, the third week in July is celebrated as Captive Municipalities Week in many of these places with speeches and parades promoting independence for such places as Yorkville, Rahn Township, Teaberry Hill, The Irish Flat’s, Altamont, Shenandoah’s First Ward, Smoketown, and Arnot’s Addition. Many of these captive municipalities have established governments in exiles, or shadow governments, with a headquarters at the Schuylkill Mall. If you stop by the Mall the headquarters is located near K-Mart. Inside the headquarters one can stop and talk to the various unofficial officials, their staff and solicitors. This year as a fund raiser you can get your child’s photo taken on the Mayor of Arnot’s Addition’s lap.

Now back to the tree. Some ornaments were immediately rejected, such as Mount Carbon’s submission of two of its residents (who were supposedly “lit up like Christmas Trees” after leaving the Brett Michael’s concert). In their place, the Court house accepted an old Bavarian Beer bottle cap. The West Penn Township’s donation of a Pontiac hood ornament from its local auto junk yard was approved after the County’s Office of Weights and Measures got its scale out and declared the weight to be acceptable. The hood ornament is now on the fifth branch from the top (east side).

Alcoholic submissions got mixed signals. Porter Township’s submission of a bottle of Porter Ale was approved after the Treasurer’s Office gave a five cent deposit on the bottle’s safe return. Walker Township’s bottle of Johnny Walker Whiskey was deemed too heavy and mysteriously vanished, only to reappear a day later... but now empty.

From the trout family to all of youse:
Merry/Happy: Select one: __Christmas, __Hanukah, __Festivus,__ Kwanzaa,__ Solstice, __Boxing Day,___ (generic) Holiday... And to all a good night.

Courthouse Cookbook

Mammy Trout is so excited about the Schuylkill County Cookbook being prepared which will feature some of the best of Schuylkill County cuisine, the foods that have made us what we are today as - you are what you eat. I always think of that line when I am at JFK Pool, looking around at the crowd. If we are what we eat, then many of us swimmers must be hams or butterball turkeys.
Yes, the cookbook will contain more than just recipes for halushki, beer nuts, birch beer and scrapple; no, many interesting quotes and words of wisdom are also included. Here is a sampling:
“Never eat more than you can lift.”
“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat & drink beer all day.”
“If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.”

Riddles are also included:
“Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.
“What can you make from baked beans and onions?” Tear gas.

Yes, the cookbook will present exemplary instruction of preparation of the savory mainstream dishes from all corners of the county, offering 1,000s of recipes without being burdened down with any dull, dumb nutritional information…borrr-ing… Instead the book has many baloney recipes submitted by local politicians, who are full of them. You will also find the sought after courthouse recipes for Prothonocherry ice cream, D.A. Split Plea Soup and Coroner's triple bacon burger.

The book will be great for cooks of all levels. It has a lot of great introductory information - how do you boil water? Can you stick your head in the microwave while it is on? Can you use bacon fat as a cake frosting substitute? Should you plug in your defibrillator before or after your super-sized bacon burger? What do you do if you run out of booze? Is it socially acceptable to practice the Heimlich maneuver during a County Commissioner meeting?

In addition, the book will ease you into many advanced recipes.

Looking to cook pig’s stomach for the annual Pine Grove Sadie Hawkins Day race?

This book will have all of the answers that you have been looking for over the years, from start to finish - from wrestling the pig to the ground, to breaking its neck, to gutting and removing the organs properly.

Trying to make a special dinner celebrating your babe’s new tramp stamp tattoo?

This cookbook has the right onion ring recipes for that happy occasion, all easy to understand and with gorgeous photos of local natives sipping on ice tea while they eat a handful of the tasty treats.

Having trouble rolling your own cigarettes to save on the high taxes?

I will leave you with a free sneak peak at this courthouse recipe:

1. Spread the tobacco out evenly on the rolling surface, preferably your desk at work.
2. Take your rolling paper and rest it with the crease between your thumb and middle finger, then rest your index finger in the crease to hold the paper down on whichever hand is not holding your cell phone or working a crossword puzzle.
3. Then using your free hand, begin at one end of the tobacco and delicately place the paper starting with the end you are holding it with.
4. Take a hold of the paper with the other hand (placing your cell phone between your jaw and your shoulder) again resting it between your middle finger and thumb.
5. Position the middle fingers so they roughly form a straight line from one end to the other.
6. Now using the thumbs, beginning rolling the cigarette between your thumb and middle fingers, doing this slow and evenly.

7. After the tobacco food product has been molded into the proper shape, pull your thumbs downward to have the edge of the paper align with the top of the tobacco.

8. Increase the pressure applied by the thumbs while moving the middle fingers upward, completing the rotation without creasing the bottom of the paper.
9. Complete the roll until the edge with the glue remains. Apply with a small streak of saliva (preferably your own rather than a co-worker who has been coughing up phlegm for days unexplainably).
10. Pinch off any loose tobacco at the ends and put back in your pouch for later use.
11. Get up from your desk and head outside. Place the unlit end in your mouth and enjoy! Smoke that cigarette for approximately 10-12 minutes before returning to work.
12. Repeat every hour.

health care ideas

I did not let my daughter, Santana, go to school the other day. I did not want her to be subjected to listening to the President tell her that she should study hard and make something of herself. It none of his business what she does with her life. I don’t want my child brainwashed by anyone not affiliated with the music industry or the pop culture. No sir-ee. Instead of school we spent the day bonding together. Instead of getting up early to drive her to the bus stop, we drove to Dunkin Donuts for breakfast, then headed down to the check cashing store on Centre Street before purchasing some smokes across the street. We then headed home to watch the Sam Lasante Show. A much better use of her time than listening to some president talk about personal responsibility. However I was curious about Obama’s health care plan and whether it will cover acute bleenia, or only cover not so cute bleenia. There is a difference you know.

After the hour of watching Sam interview Jerry the car dealer, we packed up and headed to Knoebel’s Grove. Since it was a school day it was not overly crowded, just dozens of other kids being protected from exposure to the president (all Republicans), dozens of nerdy home schoolers (mostly all Republicans), and dozens of truants (mostly Democrats).

I hate to digress, but I did notice that there were an awful lot of acutely obese people at the park, or I should say not so cutely obese people. There is a difference you know. Neither one of us had an answer but the Comet Rollercoaster had a hard time going uphill.

While waiting for a ride, we discussed health plan alternatives. I suggested that airports passengers could get full x-rays - not just their luggage or pocket items. This could be much more cost effective. Santana then cried out, “Papa, this could also be done at the courthouse as well as all other government buildings that require security checks!”
I think we trouts were onto something really big. We stumbled upon a way to put a dent in our multi-trillion dollar deficit! Prostate and foot exams as well as mammograms –even singing mammograms - could be done by the security personnel at every airport and government building! It would require some re-training of the security personnel, but that is what stimulus money is for, isn’t it?
Think of the medical savings accomplished with this simple preventative measure, some people would be getting checked once, twice or three times a day, day in day out. The X-ray machine at the Joe Zerbey International Airport as well as the one at the County Courthouse are turned on 24/7. All of that energy will no longer be going to waste.
I needed to talk to someone with authority…. I did not who to call. Then it dawned on me. I would confide with the Pottsville Surgeon General, who is under a Hippocratic oath not to divulge anything discussed by a patient. My…our…idea is bigger than the both of us and the Surgeon General would keep it a secret for now. By the way, he is neither a surgeon, nor a General but that is besides the point.

I called the Eagles Bar on my blackberry and got a hold of the Surgeon General. A press conference at the Courthouse with the Pottsville TV station carrying live coverage of maybe dental or eye exams being given at the entrance was suggested to demonstrate the cost effectiveness of the proposal. He also suggested that a different exam could be given every day of the week and if you passed five exams in a row, you get free large coffee and tastee cake at the Canteen.
Now that is what I call a non-partisan approach to a compromise on such a controversial topic. All the exams will be done by government employees, yet any treatment would still be done by private doctors.

The public and private sectors working hand-in-hand.

Groundhog Day Truce

Extra! Extra! Read all about it!
Controller’s Office and County Commissioners Office called an unofficial truce on February 2nd!

Yes, on the dark, cold eve of Candlemas Day the chimes from the courthouse clock tower sounded in the City of Pottsville….something extraordinary and unexpected was about to occur. Employees of both the Schuylkill County Commissioners’ Office and the Controller’s Office spontaneously made peace, ceased hostilities and started celebrating. They visited each other through their trench tunnels, and exchanged cigarettes at the designated county smoking station. While at the smoking station the shivering employees stamped their feet in a vain attempt to keep warm and then headed inside to share the traditional holiday meal of Lebanon bologna, pig’s stomach, and chicken corn noodle soup at the Courthouse Canteen -all washed down with some fresh birch beer by the way.

Afterwards their jovial voices started to sing in harmony the traditional Ground Hog Day carols and songs.

“how much would would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck would chuck wood….”

At first it appeared that tensions would erupt as each side kept a shoofly pie within easy reach in case self-defense was necessary. Just a few days ago peaceful co-existence was unthinkable, but now it was reality. The employees from both offices gathered together laughing, sharing both Groundhog Day gifts and Pennsylvania rub-off lottery tickets, and exchanging the traditional Pennsylvania Dutch bawdy jokes.

The hostilities had been going on for years, under the Gary Hornberger administration and continuing unabated during the current Katner command. With so many years of warfare some were now calling this truce “the miracle in the trenches” and hailed it as a shining episode of sanity. Yes, the Groundhog Day’s magic that covered the county also enveloped these two adversarial offices. The friendly feelings were inspired not only by a strong desire for a lull in the fighting but for a desire to partake in the goodies that every Courthouse office shares openly on the joyous occasion of Groundhog’s Day.
Yes, the holiday began quietly with the furry marmot once again seeing his shadow. Six more weeks of winter should have dismayed everyone, but only a few court house employees actually threw themselves from the Clock tower; far less than the prior years.

Yes, for hours, throughout all of the colorfully decoratated court house offices, Groundhog songs were sung while funnel cake was shared. The stairway between the Controller’s Office and the Commissioners Office, long considered a ‘no man’s land” became something of a playground with the rousing chorus of employees all singing in harmony:

“Let the scientific fakirs gnash their teeth and stamp with rage-
Let astrologers with crystals wipe such nonsense from the page-
We hail the King of Prophets, who's the world's outstanding Sage-
TODAY THE GROUNDHOG COMES! Glory! Glory! to the Groundhog, Glory! Glory!
to the Groundhog, Glory! Glory!
to the Groundhog, TODAY THE PROPHET COMES!”


The truce lasted all day. It was considered by some to be just a blip - a temporary respite induced by the Candlemas season.
But in these trying times of uncertainty, it is comforting to cynics, such as me, to believe that employees of the rival offices could put aside their fear and loathing of one another and extend the hand of goodwill, peace, joy, love and Groundhog Day cheer.

“Oh why can't every day be like Groundhog Day

Why can't that feeling go on endlessly.

For if everyday could be just like Groundhog Day

What a wonderful world this would be.”

Gott segen eich.

Courthouse bans smoking

May 31st is the anniversary of the Johnstown flood, a sad day in Pennsylvania’s history. This May 31st will be another sad day. It will be the day the last tobacco product is inhaled in the Schuylkill County Courthouse.

By edict of the County Commissioners, the legendary “Canteen,”the bistro located in the Courthouse basement, will no longer permit its patrons to light up. A rich chapter of tobacco usage will be closing.

Smoking had been a part of our county’s history. It was said that John Pott actually purchased the land the Courthouse sits on from the Lenni Lenape Indians for a carton of Camels, a box of Mootz peanut rolls, and a six-pack of Yuengling’s. After checking the old court manuscripts at the Historical Society, I discovered that smoking had been permitted everywhere in the Courthouse for decades. In fact it was once a job requirement; more important than say, punctuality or telephone manners. If an employee did not smoke, the likelihood of being fired increased.

There is something untrustworthy about “goody two-shoes” non-smokers.

To commemorate the unhappy occasion on May 31st, there will be a special celebration in the Courthouse with festivities beginning at 9 o’clock and continuing until closing time. For some it will take the form of dressing up as one’s favorite smoker – Marlene Dietrich, Humphrey Bogart, Bette Davis, Cheech, Mae West, Chong, Franklin Roosevelt, Popeye and Keith Richards, just to name a few. Some costumes will be more comical, Joe Camel, The Marlboro Man, Cruella De Vil, and "the Cigarette Smoking Man" from the old TV show, X-Files, will certainly be welcomed additions to bring some levity to the end of an era. I understand that several office clerks will be dressing up as “The Old Gold” dancing cigarette packs. It is this attitude of facing a crisis with a smile on one’s face that makes me proud of this County.

The row offices are not alone. While many of the row employees will wear smoking jackets and fezs, I was told that the court crier emeritus will don a bellhop uniform and “Call for Philip Morrr-issssssss!” one last time in Courtroom Number One at the stroke of four.

No, it will not just be another costume party in the Court House. There will be lots of games. Bets will be placed on who will win the ‘smoke ring’ contest. Then there is the “Who will be the employee to blow the most smoke rings with one breathe?” Your guess is as good as mine. Then there is the sophisticated “French inhale” competition scheduled for three o’clock. If you are not familiar with this European game, a contestant takes a good-sized drag from a cigarette, but instead of inhaling, the smoke is gently pushed up into the nostrils. It has been a ritual at the Courthouse since the Molly Maguire hangings. For those who want something less intense, I recommend both the “multiple cigarettes” smoking contest, as well as the “puffing and dragging” competition which pits title searchers against the Courthouse retirees.
Yes, the identity of the last person to puff away is being held confidential. You can compare it to the opening ceremony at the Schuylkill County Senior Olympics, when some top secret octogenarian gets to light the cauldron to the amazement of the crowds.

I will be there in the Canteen filled with the usual crowd, my eyes filled with tears that are held back in the sad revelry, knowing that the good times are coming to an end.

I have a guess as to who will get to savor the last puff before the Sheriff Department clears out the Canteen and hands out Black Jack chewing gum, as if that will pacify the mob. When the partying ends at 4:30 PM I will look through the thick cloud of smoke hovering over the Canteen, at the men and women holding onto their cigarette lighters, holders, ash trays, corn cob pipes, cigars, hookahs, and bongs knowing that once the last butt is stomped out, the courthouse employees may have cleaner lungs but they will also become more irritable, cranky, depressed and edgy, while gaining weight at an astounding rate.

A brave new world indeed.

Courthouse Canteen

“While getting my dog license this year, I finally realized why the Schuylkill County Courthouse has always had a reputation for fine cookery. Yes, I happened to have lunch in “The Canteen,” high upon Courthouse Hill. I started out with a cup of the highly recommended coffee while I studied the menu. The java was so strong that it made me shake as if I was Michael Jackson on his wedding night.
I have dined in the Courthouse for decades. In the early ‘60s, I remember dining in the café located on the first floor. I was there for my first divorce. I remember its name was “Mr. Bill’s Bistro.” Although it was primarily a breakfast nook, Mr. Bill would serve the finest Oscar Meyer cold cuts on Sunbeam white bread along with a hot cup of canned soup. What more could I say about Bill’s soup? Campbell’s Tomato never tasted better. And the presentation that Mr. Bill had for his consommé was exquisite – his legendary saltine crackers on the side. In fact, Mr. Bill was rumored to be the inspiration for the Soup Nazi on the TV show, Seinfeld. His loud and repetitive, “Next!” was certainly copied by the NBC scriptwriters without Bill ever getting any acknowledgement or royalties. My mouth begins to water when I think of his desert bar. It was filled with a various array of mouth watering Tastycakes. For entertainment, a radio would fade in and out, crackling with the finest in AM broadcasting. Generally you could catch some of the Phillies’ games. Then there was the weight machine that also gave your fortune – a perfect combination. Your weight, together with a fortune that was good for the rest of the day - all for one nickel! That is only 21/2 cents for each! It was not unusual to see a naïve juror take off shoes and undress prior to getting on the scale.
Unfortunately, Mr. Bill was put out of business after one elderly woman spilled some hot soup on her lap. The litigation lasted several years and eventually the sheriff had to sell everything to pay off the judgment.
In the 1970s, the Commissioners attempted to operate an “all you can eat” seafood buffet. Besides the usual fare of salmon, eel and clam chowder, the finest catch from Sweet Arrow Lake would be served daily. Nevertheless the place shut down after several months due to poor refrigeration. The dining facility then changed management more often that Michael Jackson changed his looks..
Luckily, the voters several years ago approved a $10 million bond issue and the Commissioners invested in a complete overhaul of the Courthouse dining facility. The wise outlay paid off with the grand opening of “The Canteen.” It is strictly American Wild West at it best. Think of the Hoop-de-do Revue at DisneyWorld, but on a smaller scale. Where else could you find work-release inmates singing the latest in country music while you feast? Be prepared for slapstick, corny jokes and lots of singing and dancing. But of course, the food is the center of attraction. There is a superb “Coroner’s delight buffet,” featuring an array of courthouse bologna. I stick to the split pea f.a. soup with a lean double cheese Horn Burger. A wide assortment of ice cream is also available. Enjoy a double dip of Prothonocherry or fiscal crunch while enjoying the breathtaking view of the city. If you think the restaurant revolves, you are wrong; that is the Turkish coffee working its magic once again.
How are the lavatories, you ask? Quite clean and cosmopolitan. One will find find politicians, criminals and paternity test takers, inside washing up before and after dining. No longer do you find the old, pull-down towel machine with more handprints preserved than found in Central Booking. Now a powerful hand dryer has been installed, strong enough to knock a hairpiece off an unsuspecting courthouse employee. And for you lavatory slow pokes, you can easily find a copy of the Police Gazette or the county budget to pass the time.
Lastly, The Canteen’s smoking lounge is unbelievable. It is suave and sophisticated. It is paradise found. Remember that most people involved in politics or government smoke. It is a prerequisite. Some say it has something to do with bad nerves or guilt. I just don’t know. What I do know is that Pottsville’s largest cloud of fumes since the East Penn busses crawled up Market Street now hovers in “The Canteen.” Old Gold, Viceroy, Tareyton, Raleigh, Muriel, Tiparillo, and Chesterfield – all blend together to give the lounge a special glow.
Yes I have over fifty years of fond Courthouse dining memories. I am glad to have shared a few of them with you.